23, Barking

Shit I’m a dog.

I think what the Chinese zodiac thinks of me is true. Partly, though.

A year ago, I wrote that birthday post here a few minutes before I boarded the aircraft in JFK and caught my class in Jakarta. And still I managed to uber my way to work (when I still used uber) after class on that very day and a dinner with friends I could not really say no to.

I can still locate perfectly where I store the details of each memory in my brain until today. The big picture of 22 may seem a lot like I’ve been investing in all the things I really wanted to do. Before all that, I spent many months fetching all sorts of help I needed. Did what I did not know and politely stole the arts of making things happen from the best.

How young is 23? Young enough to make shit tons of mistakes but old enough to start contributing to the family. It’s funny because I spent a large amount of my time with people in their 30s, 40s and 50s (above that I can no longer hold a long conversation with) and I’m arriving in their narratives already.

Here’s a list of things to expect when entering 20s:

-Stable job. A job with perks that pays you shit but safe for your retirement when you reach 50.

-Buy property. Either land, cheap apartment units, or a house with great mortgage. These assets will save your ass one day.

-Savings for marriage. If you plan to.

-Decide when you want to finish your study (getting PhD may scare the hell out of parents who are obsessed with having grand children fast). So do not scare them too much.

See? All these unavoidable milestones. To me, I have the freedom to ignore most part of handful advice I’ve received and go with my own plans because the youth I feel in me is still as strong as my niece asking if buddhism is similar to hinduism. Or whether or not it hurts to do stupid things. It’s a lot of questions and fun uncertainties, perhaps, translated into adult’s language, if it’s worth the shot to invest all of your money into a business idea that nobody seems to have the balls to start. I’m still in that process of the longest due diligence, preparing the runway on which all my planes will be ready to finally take off, fight against the gravity.

Being 23 is being so young you finally embrace the world that is in constant chaos, that in one day there could be a terrible earthquake in Mexico, Rohingya fleeing their Buddha majority country, and all the things that could go down, but you, as person in charge of your own world, cannot go south. This brain and heart must be trained to do everything in my power to focus only on what I can change.

What am I busy doing these days?

We must all go home. So I’m bringing everything to Lombok from business to people I’d like to work with. It’s plausible to grow everything in a place where you can still see your mother and give her your time and all the things she might not say but really needs. I think my dreams to settle and do fun things in someone else’s country can wait until I’ve secured a few things at home. Family first.

I’m setting up a foundation in Jakarta that will operate across the country soon. And some business ventures that will be the start of many amazing things with my favorite people. All of them are small but I’m certain they will all grow to be the way I see them in this head. And school, yes, that, I must finish, and this old-fashioned way of learning is about to get over soon. I just need to ensure I’ve gained a lot from these years I spent running to classes between everything and crazy amount of $ thrown into that investment.

It’s a great news I have the hands I need to catch all the balls. And it’s just a tiny part of more episodes I’m about to create in this jungle of life.

I’m so fucking ready to bark and get what’s mine, however hard that can be.

Woof, woof, guk, guk.